This boy, my smiley little boy....wow, it has been a tough 6 weeks. He is as happy as can be as long as his mommy is around, this momma is exhausted and tired!
All of the kids went through separation anxiety periods, usually when they were younger but this guy is taking it to an all new level.
While we were in Florida little man became very attached. He would melt down at the rest stops if I ran into the bathroom. I could hear him screaming outside, as soon as I walked out he would run into my arms and all would be right again. The same would happen at the hotels, he would follow me everywhere. It was actually really helpful while we were out, I never I had to worry about him wandering off.
I thought things would be better when we returned, nope! We switched him from the crib to the toddler bed, to a twin size bed. This boy is refusing to go to bed at night unless I am in there with him. In the past 6 weeks he let his big brother put him down once while I was out. I offered C an extra $20 if he could get that boy to stay in his bed and is sound asleep. I don't know what he did but it worked. I have given him the same offer a few other times but I think M has caught on and now refuses to go to bed for anyone else.
The twins have always been wonderful when going to bed. Naptime, right in and they are out. Bedtime, we would do our routine, give good night kisses, 7:30 they are out. Now naptime is just the same. Bedtime takes over an hour. Thankfully little girl will still go right to sleep.
We have tried everything!! We put in nightlights. Changed the bed time. Put a baby gate in front of the door so he could not follow me out. Nothing has worked. After he does go to sleep he will wake up around 1:00 in the morning, walk down into our room and climb right into our bed. EVERY single night.
But it isn't just bedtime. It is every time I leave the house. Usually Eric can distract him with the ipad, weather channel, or a snack. Some days I come home and he is still on the other side of the door screaming his head off. His little heart is racing and his face is red from crying so hard.
Yesterday was just heartbreaking. He has cried so hard that he makes himself sick but yesterday he was so worked up he gave himself a bloody nose :( My poor guy.
Between the separation anxiety we are also doing our speech therapy. He seems to be making progress but is still really far behind. This boy constantly babbles and can repeat any words we say now we are trying to get him to put the two together. So much of the past 6 weeks has been constantly working on his speech.
This weekend J had an away tournament. I really wanted to go. I wanted to watch J play, sleep all night in a bed not shared by twins, catch up with the moms, have some one on one time with J in the car. Just take a break!
It is so hard missing out on so much right now. At night I miss tucking the boys in or having reading time with L. By the time I can sneak out of L's room everyone has gone to bed. I attempted twice to head out for some girl time with A this week. That did not happen with little boy throwing himself in front of the door holding his shoes and his jacket crying away. We have been working so hard on his speech and he kept saying M go. M go. How could I leave him behind when he was finally communicating with us! Thankfully when he does go everything is perfect. He loves being in the car, he does great at the store, he is happy.
As a mom to 5 you would think I would have some experience on how to handle this. Being a mom of 5 does bring some perspective. I know he will out grow it and I will long for the days for him to just sit and cuddle with me. I will look down and that little hand will no longer be in mine but off running in front of me. Those sweet tears that stream down his face when I walk out the door will be on my face while I watch him head off to school. So while I am beyond exhausted I choose to cherish these hard moments. I will have a lot more coffee, I will let go of the little things, and just be there for this little guy.
